Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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