Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
