im drinking this country out of the recession.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
