no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
