he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Im part way to drunk.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
