Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
