Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
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