Got a toothbrush?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
