actually, I'm a sock model
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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