Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
