Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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