You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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