So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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