Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I'm just crazy horny about you
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
