wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Randomize