We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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