Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
It's like God shit irony all over that family
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
