never play flip cup with pint glasses
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
