but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Reggie can tackle my bush.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
