they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
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