With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
