what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I've blown a few things in my day
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
