I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
