I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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