I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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