he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
