Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize