I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
