no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Randomize
