I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
