For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
love makes seman taste better
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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