Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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