They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I stole a fireplace last night.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
