So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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