I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
