that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
