Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
