I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Randomize
