Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
