Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
