12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize