Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
