I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
