i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
