He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
