i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
