ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
just found out that she named her cat after me.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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