Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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