Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
