google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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