i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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